


Finding What's Lost

by unbroken_halo



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Amnesia, Established Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-10
Updated: 2016-08-10
Packaged: 2018-07-26 06:05:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,250
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7563184
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unbroken_halo/pseuds/unbroken_halo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Harry is cursed, Draco takes drastic measures to find his lover.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Finding What's Lost

Draco stood in the room and shook his head. _No! It's too far back._ It didn't even matter that he hadn't been in this place the first time, or any of the subsequent times that had followed, but he was here now and he watched with horror as Voldemort lifted his arm.

Green filled the room and a scream was silenced. A lovely ginger-haired woman— _Lily!_ — lay on the floor and a tiny tot— _Harry!_ — screamed as he stood in a cot. Voldemort looked away from the witch and focused on the child.

"No. Please not Harry. I don't want to see this again."

Voldemort continued forward and raised his arm. " _Avada Kedavra!_ "

Green light filled the room again and a great boom echoed, reverberating through Draco. Wind blew in from the opening of the wall where Voldemort's spell had caused a backlash that had thrown him from his body and marred Harry's tiny face.

Harry screamed again, this time in pain, not just fear, and it shattered Draco. He turned away, his heart thumping in his chest, his breath coming in pants, and sobs escaped him.

There was a rapid shift and the scene reset. Draco watched Voldemort kill Lily Potter again and then turn his wand on baby Harry. He looked away, knowing that it wouldn't change.

"Stop."

Draco's head jerked up and he looked around for the voice.

"Stop watching. It never changes." 

The voice sounded young. Far younger than he'd ever heard it in life, but he knew exactly who it was.

"I know, Harry."

The little boy crooked his head and nodded. "How did you know? How did you know my name?"

"I just know," he snapped. Draco swallowed. "Shall I call you ' freak' or perhaps, 'boy'?"

Little Harry cringed and looked away. "Please don't be mean. It isn't fair when I don't know anything about you."

"The world is not fair, Harry. It's best you learn that now."

Draco's heart broke as he watched the child Harry had been. The raggedy clothing hung off his small frame, and his face was dirty, but beneath all that was the strength of one of the bravest wizards he had ever known. The glare on Harry's face and the snarl of his mouth proved to Draco that this dream would end the same way it always had.

"I don't care if it isn't fair, there's no reason to be mean when we've not even met properly."

Draco smirked. "All right then, Harry. My name is Draco."

Harry grinned, his teeth so even and straight in spite of the rest of his bedraggled appearance. "That's better."

Draco returned the smile even as the dream began to fade, taking the young version of his lover with it.

~*~

"It's you!"

Draco turned and stared. The scene was once again familiar, but he hadn't ever been here in the Gryffindor Common Room before in real life. He eyed Harry as he sat on a sofa in front of a huge fireplace. 

"Were you expecting someone else?" Draco arched a brow and Harry giggled at him.

"No, silly. It's just you never returned and I thought I imagined you."

Draco nodded. "I suppose that was quite upsetting."

Harry slid off the squishy sofa and approached Draco. "I suppose I should be wary of you, especially considering I met a git that had your same name earlier tonight, but you were nice before, and I remembered that."

Draco's heart nearly stopped. "You remembered me?"

"Well, no, not really. But I recognized you when you came through the portrait. You were in the robe shop, too."

"That I was."

"Why are you mean?"

Draco shook his head. "I don't know, Harry." 

Harry eyed him, taking in his own set of robes and then looking down at the soft wool and black of his own against the deep green of Draco's. He looked back at Draco's face, stared him right in the eye. "Will I forget you again?"

Draco took a deep breath. "I don't know. I was a nasty git at one time. Perhaps you should forget me." Even as the words left his mouth, Draco regretted them, considering his and Harry's current circumstances.

"No, I don't think so." Harry giggled again and nodded. "And I know how to be a berk, too, you know."

All the arguments, all the insults and the bickering they had done over the years came roaring to him and seemed like fond memories. Draco wanted to have that between them once more. The discord and the more pleasurable things that happened between them, too; he wanted their life together back. He chuckled. "That I do, Harry, and I…I want to apologize for what was said tonight."

"I knew you couldn't be that git."

Draco shook his head. "Oh, but I am, Harry, and it's going to get much worse."

"We'll see," Harry stated. "I have faith that almost anyone can be redeemed."

"I certainly hope so." Draco licked his lips, his heart aching even as the scene faded once more.

~*~

"I am very angry with you."

Draco sucked in a breath, the voice so beloved and missed rang in his ears, and he could hear the age difference. He turned and looked at Harry. His hair was a bit longer, but still wild. He wore a Quidditch robe and carried his broom. They were back in the Gryffindor Common Room.

"Why did you call Hermione that name? I knew you were a git, Draco, but I never expected something like that."

Harry's tone hurt and Draco had no answer for him other than the truth. "She is your friend, and I was jealous, Harry."

Harry's eyes narrowed, but he nodded. "I don't want to not like you, Draco, but you make it very difficult."

"I know, love."

Harry drew in a breath and his eyes widened. For once Draco was glad that Harry wouldn't remember the conversation. "Love?"

"Should I apologize?"

"Boys don't call one another 'love'."

"Oh, but they do. And you are so very loved, Harry."

"Wow, you have no control whatsoever, do you? You just get meaner every year, you berk."

Draco chuckled. "You know me so well."

Harry nodded. "I keep forgetting this nice you when I wake, and the rude you is always there."

"I am here, Harry. Come back to me. Please. I am so sorry."

Harry took a step back and shook his head. "No. You aren't real. Just like the voice, and I want you to go away."

The scene dissolved so quickly that Draco was thrown out of the memory potion. He struggled against the sensation of coming awake, and fell from the bed to land hard on the floor.

"Draco!" 

Hands grabbed him and helped him to stand, and he looked up into Hermione Granger-Weasley's face. He closed his eyes and shook his head.

Hermione sighed. "You need to go home and rest. Going under so many times isn't going to help matters."

Draco shook his head. "No. He still doesn't fully remember me, but it's getting better."

Hermione stared at him. "For who, Draco? You?" She eyed him as he dusted his backside off. "You've been under the influence of the Rememoration Draught for days. Despite sleeping, there are circles under your eyes and you are paler than normal."

Draco opened his mouth to answer her, but she cut across him. "For Harry? The curse was bad enough, Draco. The spell nearly killed him and he forgot us all. Not just you, but Ron and I as well. You are going to confuse him and set him back."

"No. I refuse to give up on him. He's in there, Hermione, and I know the potion is working."

She reached out and shook his shoulder. "Stubborn as the day is long. We should follow the healer's advice and let him come back naturally."

Draco shook his head. "I can't. I can't lose him again, Hermione."

"You won't," Hermione whispered and pulled him from the room.

~*~

Draco entered the flat and sighed. Exhaustion bled through his veins as he hung his cloak up on the coat rack. Walking through the flat, he undressed, his clothing dropping to the floor as he discarded it, and he stepped into the ensuite naked except for his wand holster.

With a flick of his wand, the hot water in the shower poured forth and steam rolled out of the frosted glass doors. With another sigh, Draco entered the stall and closed his eyes against the spray. Ducking his head into the stream, Draco ran through the events of the past few days.

He remembered having lunch in Diagon Alley with Harry. He recalled their conversation and the argument about whether or not to have dinner with his parents. He frowned at the memory of Harry being cursed in the back while they left the restaurant. It hurt that he had been able to do nothing except watch.

The wizard, a man Harry had once detained on some magical crime, snuck up behind them and cursed Harry. The spell name lingered on the edge of his memory, but it drifted away, and all that Draco was left with was the outcome. Harry's heart had stopped and he'd fallen at Draco's feet, pale and still.

Draco's numerous attempts to Rennervate him had failed. It wasn't until a Muggleborn Auror arrived with a contingent of medical personnel from St. Mungo's that something had been done to help Harry. A simple Muggle remedy of resuscitation had revived Harry's heart enough to be transported.

When Harry had awoken, he couldn't remember anything. The medical staff at St. Mungo's had told him to give it time, but Draco was impatient. He wanted Harry back now.

Draco shook his head. He couldn't dwell on that right at this moment. He had to think positive. Harry would come back. He could just hear Harry's voice telling him he would be back and that he would chase away the melancholy thoughts Draco had worked himself into.

Draco smiled as he thought back to the last time he'd been in the shower. The morning Harry had been cursed, Draco had been brooding about the upcoming dinner with his parents. He'd hidden in the bathroom and Harry had come after him, distracting him from the disaster waiting to happen. Narcissa had welcomed Harry with open arms, while Lucius still made every attempt to banish Harry from their lives.

Harry ignored his father's ways and tried everything under the sun to put a smile back onto Draco's face. Intimacy and silliness almost always did the trick. They'd had a leisurely time of it, playing and teasing one another under the heavy shower spray and the cleansing bubbles of Harry's favorite soap. And Draco laughed in response to the memories.

He ran his hands over his body, washing away the grit and grime of sleep. His fingers graced over the planes of his stomach as he remembered and curled in the hairs under his navel.

His cock hardened and he wrapped a hand around himself, dreaming it was Harry's larger, more calloused fingers instead of his own. He stroked, imagining Harry's teeth nibbling on his neck as he leaned into each stroke.

Pressing one hand to the wall, Draco sped up his hand, Harry's voice from the memory echoing in his head.

"Like that? Slow and easy, hrm?"

"Yes," Draco breathed out loud, just as he had the day before yesterday.

"If only your parents were as easy as this."

"Oh, Merlin! Don't bring them into the shower, or the bed with us, again."

Harry's chuckle ghosted across his memory and Draco moved his fist faster over himself. He would have sworn that Harry was a viable presence in the bath with him and could nearly feel the length of Harry’s body pressed against his back. Harry's prick, hard and long, slid between his cheeks as they moved together.

Draco hung his head, his toes curling and tensing against the slick tiles as he worked himself to a finish. He gasped and continued to pump his fist along his cock, watching his release swirl away down the drain.

The very real sense of Harry faded and Draco bit his lip, trying not to sob at the loss of his lover. He quickly soaped his body and finished his bath. Wrapping a towel about his waist, Draco padded into the bedroom and fell face first onto the bed, Harry's scent surrounding him as he closed his eyes. He'd only rest a moment, then go back to the hospital. He'd catch a quick dinner and take his next draft of the potion.

The sun shown in the window and blinded Draco into wakefulness. He rolled over and gasped, jerking out of bed as he realized that he'd slept through the night and on into the next day. Shoving his body into clothing, Draco hurried through a piece of toast and a lukewarm cup of tea and then ran from the flat, speeding his return to the hospital and to Harry.

~*~

"You're late."

Draco nodded and stepped in through the portrait. "I apologize," he began and then paused. The Harry before him was older, much older than the last visit they had had, and he wondered how much time has passed.

"You bastard!"

Draco jerked at the tone of Harry's voice. He looked up to find Harry coming at him, his hands curled into fists at his sides. Draco stood his ground, waiting for the impact, and he closed his eyes.

It never came, and Draco opened one eye, studying Harry.

"Where have you been?" Harry snarled then turned away from Draco and paced in front of him. He stomped across the common room and Draco watched him.

"Where were you when I needed you? I waited for you, wondering what happened to you and if what had occurred between us, this not dream you, had changed us for good?" Harry paused and looked at Draco.

"In spite of all the shit from you with the dementors, the bloody tournament, Sirius' death and this fucking year, I still waited for you each time I went to bed. I had to deal with the arsehole you in my waking hours, and yet, I went to bed, looking for my friend. You never came, though. No matter how sarcastic you were in my dreams, you had always been there before."

Draco continued to stare at Harry, trying to figure out just how old Harry was and what exactly had happened. Then it hit him as he watched Harry pace. The potion was still in Harry's body and it had advanced him through the years without Draco. Hermione had been correct, he had done harm to Harry whilst trying to get him back. 

Draco looked Harry over trying to guess Harry's age. He took a wild guess and blurted out his thoughts, "Have you already cursed me?"

Harry narrowed his eyes at Draco. "Have I already cursed you? Is that all you've to say? After everything that I mentioned, that is what you ask me?"

"What do you want me to say, Harry? I'm sorry I nearly cursed you with an Unforgivable?" Draco snapped. "I warned you that things would get worse before they got better and you laughed at me."

"Yes, I fucking cursed you and then Snape bloody killed Dumbledore and took you with him. He took you away from me!" Harry snarled and lunged at Draco, and Draco waited for him. Instead of the fist to the face as he was expecting, Harry wrapped his arms around him and slanted his mouth over Draco's.

Draco was so stunned that he gasped, and Harry took the opportunity to slide his tongue inside Draco's mouth. The moan from Harry jolted Draco into action, and he returned Harry's kiss with just as much enthusiasm.

Harry pulled away from him abruptly and ran the back of his hand over his mouth. He narrowed his eyes at Draco, then sighed. "I wasn't expecting that."

Draco gaped at him. "You threw yourself at me. What did you expect?"

"I don't know!" Harry threw up his hands in frustration. "I'm remembering things. I don't understand why I remember some things and yet, they are different than the ones I know. I don't know why I have dreams of you. Dreams where we are…" he trailed off.

Draco waited and watched Harry, smirking as a flush of colour crawled over Harry's cheeks. "Are we intimate, Harry? You remember us being together?"

Harry looked away from him and nodded. "Yes," he murmured. "I also have memories of Ginny and those confuse me as well."

Draco nodded. "She is there, too. Those memories are real, as are the ones where you and I are together." He took a step closer to Harry and Harry swallowed, but he waited as Draco drew near.

Draco graced his fingers over Harry's cheek. "You were cursed, love, and I lost you. You forgot me in real life and I came to get you back. You returned once for me, even though your life was in danger, but you came back." He smiled at Harry. "It meant a great deal to me."

Harry nodded. "I think…I think I remember that."

"Then it is time for us to go home, Harry. It's time to wake."

Before his eyes, Harry aged. The school robes changed to the horrid, oversized Muggle clothing again. Harry's face grew dirty, his whiskers grew in and his body thinned. His clothing switched once more. It fit better, but was torn and ragged. Scratches appeared on his skin, one eye blackened and blood ran down Harry's cheek.

The injuries healed before Draco's eyes and once more Harry aged. His body thickened and strengthened from the thin waife he had been after the year on the run to the broad shouldered and strong Auror Harry had become.

Harry shuddered and Draco just watched, waiting to see how his mind and body was going to repair itself. Harry gave an all-over body shiver and his robes became the uniform he wore with pride.

Draco smiled and then gasped as Harry's eyes widened. Harry grimaced and winced, curling in on himself. Stepping forward, Draco held out a hand to Harry and Harry reached for him. 

"No, not again," Draco murmured as time sped, the potion forcing them both through the memories. The curse struck Harry giving Draco a colourful view of the magic as it surrounded him. The memory of that, seeing it happen once more made Draco ache in sympathy.

Harry gasped and fell back from Draco, but Draco reached out for him. This time, his fingers tangled in Harry's robes and together they fell into nothingness.

And Draco woke, his hand still clenched into Harry's clothing. Only this time, the cloth under his hand was rough cotton and the odd off-white of a medical gown.

"Draco?" Harry asked, his voice raspy from disuse.

Draco looked up into Harry's eyes and smiled. "Yes, love?"

Harry gave him a tired grin. "You came for me."

Draco nodded. "I did."

Harry closed his eyes, rolling into Draco's body and sighed. "Don't leave me again."

"Never." Draco wrapped his arm around Harry and pressed a kiss to his hair. Reaching over, he pressed his palm to the spell pad embedded in the bed and summoned the medi-witch.

It was time to go home.

The End

**Author's Note:**

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